A brief comparison

A few simple, but noticeable, differences between this year and last year:

- Last year I had to sharpen pencils EVERY SINGLE DAY because kids would destroy them on purpose.
- This year I had to sharpen pencils for the first time today (that's 13 days of school with one pencil per child!)

- Last year at least one kid was impatient and lazy and dumped their lunch tray on the floor next to the trash can EVERY SINGLE DAY (seriously, for 180 days!!!)
- This year, not one kid has accidentally spilled anything on the floor by the trashcan.

- Last year I had 5 kids ALL year that did their online reading homework (10 short books per month).
- This year I had 15 (of 18) kids start their reading online the very first night I assigned it (two of them even read over 20 books already!)

I LOVE my class this year! It's going to be such a good year!

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 6

Here is the final installment of our 180 Crazy Things for 180 Days list. This is the whole group portion:

153. Positive reinforcement!

154. All the parents refusing to listen to directions at the farm and going the wrong way

155. Kids eating grass on field day

156. Kids giving "pretend wedgies and pretend choking"

157. Kids bullying third graders in art from the hallway so the teacher had to put up paper in the window

158. Only whole class bathroom breads allowed

159. Military marching for PE minutes

160. Prison riot! Kids start doing we will rock you song (stomp stomp clap) during lunch all together

161. Kids "texting" on nintendo ds on game day

162. A kid with the user name "sexy" on their ds

163. kids chewing up the metal part of pencils and ripping it off

164. kids acting like babies - need to get "diapers"

165. Bullying 4th graders on the bus

166. girls breaking the toilet paper roll every day in the bathroom

167. Kids leaving trash and soap ALL over the bathroom floor daily!

168. Being required to walk in 2 lines to keep the kids closer to the teacher

169. Kids having to stand in one lunch line because they were being so rude to the lunch ladies they had to be monitored

170. Kids having to sit in one long line across the lunch tables instead of across from eachother

171. Kids climbing the soccer net at recess.

172. Recess violence daily = mulch throwing, hitting, kicking, pushing

173. insanity of 2 teachers out and NO subs!

174. Author Seymore Simon came and HE had to ask our kids to be quite more than once

175. All the second grade teachers yelling at them during the talent show and none of them listening

176. 26 kids kicked out of a movie for being rude

177. first grade kept after an assembly to get yelled at by the principal for being unruly

178. Assigned places in line for walking in the hallway

179. girls finding poop smashed between the toilet seat and toilet every day

180. kid secretly writing "bye bye" on the hallway white board before leaving on the last day

I have no idea how we survived. I think I blocked out such a large portion of the year, and honestly that was the only way I made it through. Thank goodness I have the BEST team in the world.

Can't wait for next year and the sweet little kindergarteners coming up. Oh what a change it will be! haha

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 5

Part 5 of 180 Crazy Things for 180 days:

133. Boy's parents telling him to hit others

134. Boy destroying teacher's room throwing things everywhere and ripping things off the walls

135. Boy's mom going crazy on teachers when a kid was pretend fighting

136. Girl shoving teacher out of the way to get out of the school

137. on the 176th day of school a girl told the teacher "did you know your classroom is right next to mine?" haha

138. poop falling out of pants onto the floor

139. Girl showing her crotch the first day of school

140. Girl grabbing her crotch then touching another kid

141. Girl cut another girl's shirt on purpose

142. Kids refusing to go with the reading specialist, as if they had a choice

143. Boy mocking teacher when asking kids to be quiet

144. Boy stealing another boy's milk and running away with it at lunch

145. note from parent sppd=supposed

146. Girl's mom bragging about her kid and how smart they are when they are the lowest one

147. Girl leaving her things ALL across the classroom after school

148. Girl that walks like a baby giraffe

149. Last day gift: picture of student in a baggie

150. Boys hitting and kicking everyone during the talent show

151. "get your cotton pickin' hands off..."

152. Boy had to sit behind the pocket chart hidden against the wall so as not to annoy others

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 4

Part four of 180 Crazy Things for 180 Days:

97. Boy peeing on another boy's foot

98. Boy cutting another's hair

99. Kids eating poisonous seed pods at recess - calling poison control

100. Mean girls

101. Girl laughing in the face of a kid with special needs

102. Girl writing "dam bech" on her namtag

103. Parents passing out extra snow cones to some kids on field day

104. Boy's grandma bullying the front office staff

105. screaming match with girl's mom

106. Boy refusing the bathroom during the break to be first in line, then pooping his pants on the way back to class - repeatedly!

107. "____ spit in the water fountain" - kids refused to use the water fountain ALL year because of this

108. brainstorming "jackass" for short a

109. Boy threatening to kill himself

110. boy putting boogers on EVERYONE!

111. Boy's hair being shaved into designs when told not to over and over

112. "I whip my baby back and forth" song

113. Boy sitting at his desk and eating his entire worksheet!

114. Boy throwing scissors across the room

115. Boy saying "your mom loves you naked"

116. Boy telling another boy he has "sexy dark chocolate legs"

117. Boy touching others in inappropriate places

118. "my name is Kari" song at show and tell

119. Boy calling another boy a dick

120. Boy breaking the computer headphones on purpose

121. Boy wearing a onesie to school

122. Boy saying "___ showers with girls!"

123. Girl giving Christmas gift: "this used to be my mom's but she didn't like it so now it's yours"

124. Boy telling others "all first grade teachers are fat"

125. Boy spitting in the trashcan all the time

126. Mean girls refusing to find each others names in the word search

127. Boy's "one man play" at talent show tryouts

128. Boy throwing a rock at the birds nest with eggs in it

129. Boy opening his mouth and saying "mucus" as it dribbled down his chin

130. Girls refusing to applaud for people at the talent show because they didn't get picked to be in it.

131. Boy putting so much confetti in his hair during the talent show

132. teacher requesting chid gets glasses ALL year - last day of school he shows up with some

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 3

Part 3 of 180 Crazy Things for 180 Days:

74. Girl peeing in a water bottle

75. Girl making weapons out of paper clips and passing them out at recess

76. Girl mooning everyone at recess

77. Girl shoving a teacher out of their way at recess

78. Boy refusing to pick up an envelope when the teacher asked. Flat out saying no and walking away

79. Girl throwing a major fit and physically refusing to move

80. Boy writing "sorry you are a big fat cow" as an apology

81. Girl kicking another girl in the stomach

82. Boy throwing his jacket in the basketball hoop at recess

83. 2 girls ate glue

84. Boy asked where babies come from. teacher responded, "mommy"

85. Girl laughed at boy's mom's head covering at the holiday party

86. Girl's mom bullying the teacher!

87. Boy asking for permission to throw up

88. Girl using her belt as a whip at lunch

89. Girl throwing a fit in art as though she was possessed

90. Yelling at kids not to touch the wall then turning around and seeing the first boy in line hitting his hand repeatedly against the wall to spite the teacher

91. Girl put sticky tack in other girls hair

92. One boy FINALLY getting it on the LAST day of school "oh wait, that book rhymes"

93. Asking the kids to clean something up and finding a bigger mess after they tried

94. Boy yelling out, "IT'S SEXY TIME!"

95. Boy wearing sweat bands every day for weeks. "he looks like Richard Simmons"

96. Boy yelling out during the Fantastic Mr. Fox Play. "did y'all have fun?" "NOOOO!!!"

haha I'm cracking up just typing all these out again. Stay tuned for part 4. 2 teachers and the whole group left to go!

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 2

Here is part two of 180 Crazy Things for 180 Crazy Days:

38. Boy threatening to kill everyone in class the first month of school

39. Girl pooping on the bathroom floor repeatedly

40. Girl's mom calling the superintendent to tattle

41. Boy leaving his group and wandering around Dewberry Farm alone

42. Girl and boy saying the eat armpit hair and drink pee

43. "the only thing that could make today better is if girls were running around in bikinis and we could run around like horses"

44. Girl bringing a cell phone to school and telling teacher it was a heart monitor

45. "can I have a piece of teacher appreciation cake since my mom brought it"

46. "gimme some chili on that" to the lunch ladies

47. Girl pushing others off the stage to be in the top row of pictures

48. Girl giving every first grade teacher a Christmas gift, except her own teacher

49. Boy pushing someone off the top of the playscape

50. Girl calling her teacher rude to her face "I'm not rude, YOU'RE RUDE!"

51. Boy dancing and grabbing his crotch at talent show tryouts

52. Boy bringing crayon outside and drawing a picture on the sidewalk

53. last day goodbyes - boy asking, "can you kiss me?" to his teacher

54. Boy writing his name in crayon on a desk

55. Boy telling the class he is "a pimp"

56. Girl picking her toes during reading group

57. Boy baby voice

58. Girl telling the kids she "hates God"

59. Girl spitting gum on the playground blacktop

60. Girl doing cartwheels into people at Kroger

61. Boy sobbing the whole way to the field trip crying, "I miss my mommy!"

62. Boy singing "down by the river and the hanky panky. Where your mama is fat and her breath is stanky"

63. Girl forging a note from her parents

64. Kids screaming out during the moment of silence at field day

65. Boy wearing girl's pink jacket and all the kids laughing about it

65. Boy wearing his huge "ring pop" style rings

66. Boy asking his teacher to tie a scarf around him to look like a halter top

67. Boy and his "boob hugs"

68. Boy jumping on the stage immediately after hearing "do not touch the stage"

69. Girl bumping into teacher on purpose as she was walking laps for time out

70. Boy stabbing girl with his finger during talent show

71. One of the boy class bullies calling a girl a bully during the talent show. Can we say calling the kettle black?

72. Boy's mom emailing 10 minutes after school is out to complain about grades.

180 Crazy Things for 180 Days! - Part 1

On the 100th day of school each first grade class came up with a list of "100 things we love about first grade". Nearing the end of the year, we were all (the teachers) just about to lose our minds with the kids being SO out of control with no way to stop them. To save our sanity, we decided to come up with a similar list, only instead of 100 things we love, it was going to be 100 crazy things that happened. We figured it would give us some good laughs since the year was almost over. Once we got started and found how easy 100 was, we decided to take it a step further. We decided that there are 180 days in the school year, so we should make a list of 180. You would be surprised how easy it was to come up with this stuff!

I've decided to post a version of this list here and just not include the identifying information. If nothing else, it will make me laugh, but maybe you can get just a glimpse of what our year was like at the same time. Feel free to laugh, some of this is crazy shit! I'm going to break this up into a series of posts, one post for each teacher's class, and then one for the whole group.

So, without further ado, part one of "180 Crazy Things for 180 Crazy days!"

1. Putting a girl in timeout only to have her mom tell her she doesn't have to listen to the teacher and can play on field day.

2. Screaming fits in the hallway - weekly!

3. Girl flat out stealing another girl's yearbook and putting it in her backpack

4. Grand Theft Auto! Boy stealing a 5th grader's motorized scooter

5. Boy spitting on his neighbor while working in class because "I wanted to"

6. Boy hiding under the library bookshelves and refusing to come out for 10 minutes

7. Boy climbing and hanging on the bookshelves in library saying "I'm climbing a mountain!"

8. Boy telling girl she should write about her mom in her treasure book. "write about how she sits home and drinks beer all day!"

9. Boy coloring ALL over his brand new white jacket in marker

10. Boy bringing pills to school in his pocket - the day after a drug free lecture!

11. Boy eating markers, telling the teacher he didn't, then showing off his bright blue tongue

12. Boy breaking a pencil over his knee while the teacher watched

13. Boy's mom passing out 15 packs of gushers to random children on field day while other kids watched

14. Boy throwing his desk as hard as he could

15. Boy splashing water all over kids at the bathroom sink - other kid's face and hair were SOPPING wet!

16. Boy stomping on another boy's foot "because I felt like it"

17. 2 girls singing a spur of the moment inappropriate song at talent show tryouts

18. Boy's note from outclass, "please seek help before next year" which of course later was changed

19. Girl dumping an entire bottle of water on a teacher's foot then walking away without a word.

20. Boy saying "Mrs. Mac is fat" to other kids

21. Repeating "no climbing on the fence" 5 times. kids come back from recess - 2 climbed the fence!

22. During story time on the carpet the first week ... boy crawling and head butting children screaming at the top of his lungs "get out of my way" over and over

23. Boy spitting his water on teacher's desk and papers because he was mad

24. Boy licking the neighboring class window on his way to the bathroom.

25. Boy galloping around the carpet making horse noises for 25 straight minutes

26. Boy yelling at lunch lady "hey lady, is there any more bread back there?!?"

27. Boy running around the room with scissors in his mouth

28. Girl peeing in her pants on purpose because she got in trouble

29. Girl ripping labeling stickers off the ONLY book she was allowed to touch all year

30. Boy kicking and hitting the walls for an extended period of time

31. Someone coloring all over the carpet and no one owning up to it

32. Boy giving a used bottle of baby lotion for Christmas - gross!

33. Boy stealing someone's boomerang on the way to recess then beating children with it.

34. Boy telling the whole class "I know where puppies come from. The mom dog poops them out!"

35. Boy's mom coming to school to yell at him in front of the class

36. Boy ripping a bat from a teacher's hand and yelling "gimme that! I want that"

37. Boy sticking crayons up his nose in art.

Insanity I tell you. Part 2 to come later!

Grand Theft Auto

I keep saying they can't do anything else that will surprise me, and yet, shit like this keeps happening:

After school today I was walking by the nurse's office when a group of teachers stopped me.

T: Hey, you have J in your class right?

me: yeah, why

T: do you happen to know if he has a motorized scooter?

me: as far as I know, no he does not

T: do you happen to know if he rode one to school today?

me: no, he definitely didn't. He was tardy because his mom brought him and then stayed for the awards ceremony at 8:30

T: oh, well we think he stole one then ...

Tracy then goes on to tell me that J has apparently stolen an older student's motorized scooter and rode it home. They got outside with the walkers and this one older kid was a little late. When she got out there she saw her scooter was gone. They looked down the road and could see J riding it way down the street. They were calling his parents to try and confirm that it was in fact stolen, and not actually his.

Um, can you say first grade grand theft auto?!?! HE FREAKING STOLE A MOTORIZED SCOOTER! Who does that?!?! I have to admit, this one actually left me in a state of complete shock. There isn't a lot that actually surprises me anymore, but this just takes the cake. I'm interested to hear tomorrow how it all turned out. I know that some teachers were suggesting we actually call the police and have them go teach him a lesson about theft, but I don't know how it all ended up playing out because I had to leave.

This is complete INSANITY I tell you. INSANITY!!!

spit

Yesterday I was sitting at my guided reading table organizing a few things while the kids worked. One little boy came up to me and reported that his neighbor had spit on him. He held up his arm, and sure enough, there was a large puddle of spit right there. So I call the neighbor up to chat:

Me: Did you spit on C?

A: *shakes head no*

Me: I'm going to ask again, did you spit on C?

A: *shakes head no*

Me: this is your last chance before I go check the cameras to see if you're lying. Did you spit on C?

A: *looks down* yeah

Me: *getting angry* why in the world would you spit on someone?!?!

A: I dunno, I just wanted to

WTF kind of kid turns to his neighbor and thinks "hey, it might be fun to spit on you right now" and then does it in the middle of class?!? OMG. Every day is something new ...

Field Day

For the past three years, field day has been one of my favorite days of the year at school. This year however, for reasons which I think have been made clear already, I was NOT looking forward to it. All in all the day turned out fine, and the kids were no more bad than normal, because at least were allowed to scream like crazies all day. There were some VERY memorable moments though:

On the way out to the "opening ceremony" for field day I was walking next to a student in Michelle's class. Out of nowhere he busts out with this awesome quote of the day: "Ms. McCormack, there is nothing that could make this day any better! Well, except if there were girls in bikinis everywhere and we were running around like horses" hahahahahaha

After everything that happened with poison control yesterday you would not believe this next story. All the kids start telling on a boy in my class saying he has candy in his pocket. Upon further inspection we find that he has pills in his pocket! He said he found them on the floor at home and thought he would bring them to school. Um he actually brought drugs to school! Keep in mind what happened yesterday ... omg crazy!

One of my students got caught shoving another student out of line, so I calmly told her she needed to sit out a round before she would be allowed to play again. She then decided to throw a monsterous baby fit. I calmly explained to her that she had two choices: 1. stop crying, miss one round, and play again or 2. continue to throw a fit and be done for the entire day. I walked away so she could make her choice and when I looked back her mom was putting her back in the line telling her it was okay, she could play! Um, wtf?!? I'm a little scared of the mom, but I went back over and told her she had time out. She said "but my mom said I could play". Um no. I'm the teacher, you listen to me. sorry dear. Seriously, what parent does that?!?!

At the end of the games we got to have snow cones at the front of the school. The kids all got their snow cone, then sat in the shade to eat and rest for 15 minutes. While they were sitting we look up and notice that a number of kids are holding packages of gushers, and lots of kids start to complain. Turns out one of my kids' parent had brought 18 packages of gushers and was letting her child choose his favorite people in first grade to give them to just then. Um, number one WE DON'T TAKE FOOD FROM STRANGERS (do we remember the drug talk yesterday?!?) and number two why would someone hand out treats to some but not all. Oh geez!

And to end the day we had to have one more drama moment. 5 kids in my class had picked up their yearbook today. They left them in the room while we went to Michelle's room to watch the movie. When we came back they had 15 minutes they were allowed to go to the other first grade classes to get kids to sign it if they wanted. Well, one of their yearbooks was gone. We searched her desk, searched her backpack, and I asked at least 3 times if anyone knew where it was. Of course no one said anything. I finally tell them all to open their backpacks as I am going to have to search them since someone has clearly stolen it. Sure enough, one little girl comes over with it just then and says "um, I was just looking at it" um no, you were not just looking at it. You just pulled it out of your backpack because you freaking STOLE it. oh my god. these kids are completely nuts!

Every day you think nothing could surprise you more, then something happens like a kid brings drugs to school haha. Wonder what Monday has in store ...

art bullies

I haven't been very good about blogging this year, and this group of kids has been so crazy the only thing you can do is laugh (now that it's almost over that is; before that all you could do was cry) so I think I need to go back and tell some of these crazy stories, just for memory sake. You may see a number of entries in a row with some crazy stories, so go ahead and laugh, and then thank your lucky stars this hasn't been your year!

Let's start with the art room story. The art room in our school is off a main hallway, which you have to walk by on the way to and back from lunch. Every day when our first graders are coming back from lunch the third graders are in outclass. One day we noticed that the art teacher had put paper up in all the windows next to the door, but only to about a first grader's height. Upon further investigation we found out that every day when the first grade crazies were walking back from lunch they were making faces at the third graders and "bullying" them through the glass. It got so bad none of the third graders could get work done, and were all complaining about how mean the first graders were, so the teacher had to put up paper so the little ones could no longer see in the windows. First graders bullying third graders. Um, that's just not right.

To go along with this, when we found out they had been bullying the third graders some fourth graders started coming out saying that they didn't want to sit by the first graders on the bus because they were too mean to them. We don't just bully each other in first grade, we bully older kids too! Now, a teacher has to ride the bus every day after school to control them. Dear lord!

poison control

Every day I go to work I say nothing else can possibly surprise me at this point ... and yet, every day these kids manage to do something idiotic that surprises me!

Today, it was poison. Yeah, they ate poison at recess. Just let that sink in for a second and start to understand what exactly we are dealing with in first grade this year!

So, the kids went out for recess today and as they are coming back in Coleen was totally freaking out. Apparently, on a dare, a number of kids chose to eat some random seed pods they found on the ground at recess. Not knowing what these things were, she dragged them down to the nurse to have her check on it. They ended up having to call poison control. You heard me, POISON CONTROL. (wtf?!?) Turns out, the seed pods they ate are only poisonous to cattle, BUT they do have a narcotic effect if eaten, AND, had the kids eaten the plant instead of just the seeds, THEY COULD HAVE DIED! I wish I was kidding. Do these kids think anything of this event? Of course not. It's just another typical day in first grade this year.

I swear, what else could they do at this point that would surprise me?!? Just wait until tomorrow, I'm sure there will be something new...

Tomorrow is field day. God help us all!

Marriage Advice

I have a million and one crazy stories from this year and I've done a lot of complaining about the kids so I thought I would share a cute story (there aren't too many of these unfortunately haha, but this one is pretty darn good):

J: Ms. McCormack, did you get married yet?

Me: no, not yet

J: gosh, just pick someone already!

Me: Well, I can't just pick anyone now can I? I have to pick someone good!

J: hm, yeah, okay, that's true

S: (Dead serious) Don't pick anyone that does this (pretends to pick her nose while I start laughing hysterically!) I'm serious! They will put it on you Ms. McCormack!

hahahahahaha

so there you have it ... quality marriage advice from a 7 year old. Don't marry a nose picker because if you do, they will wipe it on you. hahaha I'm still laughing at this one!

What is wrong with these kids?!?

"What's wrong with these kids" has become the first grade mantra this year. I swear you hear someone saying it at least once an hour around our hallway. Here is another story that just goes to show what these kids are like:

Friday we were picking the kids up from lunch so they were all sitting in rows on the ground and the teachers were standing up front. One kid got up from their seat and came to dump out their water bottle (without asking, but that's a battle not worth fighting at this point). As she dumped out the water bottle in the water fountain it splashed ALL over me! My shoe was soaked, there was water on my pants, and my hand was wet. I turned toward her and made this face like "did that really just happen?" as I waited for her to say something. She made this gross face at me and threw up her hands like "what? I didn't do anything", did not say a word, and just walked off. Um WHAT?!?! I'm sorry, but what first grader acts like that?!?! I would have been mortified if I had spilled water all over my teacher!

So I'll say it again ... What is wrong with these kids?!?!

17 1/2 more days.

comparison

Oh my goodness; I am SO sick of having todo everything different because the first graders are so out of control! Let's just have a little normal group of kids vs our kids comparison so you can see what I'm talking about:

normal kids: our crazies

walk in one line: must walk in two lines to be closer to the teacher

sit on both sides of the lunch table: sit on only one side of the lunch table

sit anywhere with their class at lunch: have assigned seats at lunch

use two lines at lunch: only allowed to use one line at lunch

can go through the lunch line alone: must be monitored so only 5 can get lunch at a time

go to the bathroom as needed: get three whole class bathroom breaks a day

can walk in the hall alone: must have a responsible buddy to go in the hallway

can get a new pencil as needed: only allowed one pencil that is sharpened twice a week

can run/walk laps for pe min at recess: must walk in a silent straight line for pe min

can walk in the hall with hands behind back: must put hand over mouth to keep from talking

21 more days. You would think with so few days left we might be safe from being called into the office to be asked to do something different with these kids to control them, but unfortunately, you would be wrong. goodness gracious!

Pencils

So every year the kids come to school with a million supplies. As part of their supplies they each have to bring a pack of 24 pencils. I am one of those teachers that regulates pencils. I don't just let the kids keep them in their desk and use a sharpener when they want, because let's face it, first graders feel their pencil has to be sharpened after every single word they write. So in my classroom I have two pencil cups, one for sharp pencils, and one for broken pencils. If your pencil breaks, you put it in one cup and take a new one from the other. Every couple days I use my electric sharpener to sharpen all the broken pencils. In three years I have NEVER had a problem with this system. There have always been enough pencils that when I go to sharpen them, if I notice one has no eraser, I usually would just throw it away and get a new one. At the end of the year I always end up sending home extra pencils with the kids because there is SUCH a surplus.

This year however, is a whole other story! Let this be an example of the kind of kids I'm dealing with here: EVERY day I have to sharpen pencils, and on a fairly regular basis by noon the next day I have to sharpen more because so many have been broken. If I get out new pencils, the erasers are gone on every single one by the end of the day. I have a kid who chews on pencils (and I have no idea who it is). Not just lightly, I mean flat out gnaws on the pencil until the metal part pops off and the wood is shaved down almost to the lead. One apparently likes to break pencils over their knee, and no amount of punishment seems to put an stop to it. Someone has a pencil sharpener hidden somewhere in the room (not the desk because I searched those) and often will sharpen the wrong end of the pencil so both sides have a point on it. And lord knows where half the pencils go, they just flat out disappear.

In previous years I have sent home packages of pencils at the end of the year. This year, we ran out of pencils a month ago. This is insanity! I flat out refuse to buy more pencils for them! What is it about this group?? There must be something in the water... haha

Something is wrong here ...

There is something seriously wrong with this picture:

me: yesterday we had a big problem with kids in this class climbing on the fence by the road at recess. Maybe you didn't know for SURE yesterday, but you know for sure today. There will be NO CLIMBING ON THE FENCE. none. not at all. Don't even go so close to it that a teacher thinks you might be thinking about climbing on it. Do you understand?

kids: yes ma'am

me: okay, repeat after me "I will not climb on the fence"

kids: repeat in unison 4 times in a row.

me: okay, so we are clear. There will be NO CLIMBING ON THE FENCE at recess today. If you choose to climb on the fence, then you will be written up. Is that clear?

kids: yes ma'am

me: okay, go get in line for recess, but remember DO NOT CLIMB ON THE FENCE!

kids come back inside from recess 30 minutes later:

kid: Ms. McCormack, I hurt my hand on the fence

me: YOU WHAT?!!? What were you doing by the fence????

kid: uh, climbing it

kid 2: A was climbing on the fence as well!

And it was about that moment that the last strands of hair were ripped from my head and I had a complete mental breakdown at school.

Something is seriously wrong with this picture. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM?!? ugh!

25 days. 25 days. I think I can. I think I can.

First Grade Crazies

It's no secret that the first graders this year are a crazy group. I find more often than not I have to use my angry teacher voice with them, and because of behavior they don't get to do a lot of the fun things I normally would do with my class.

Today at the end of the day one sweet little girl who is ALWAYS good, but is unfortunately stuck with this group, said to me, "Ms. McCormack! You're using your nice voice today. We must have been good!" Poor baby, if only the good ones could hear my nice voice more often. I feel so bad for them because year after year they are going to be lumped in with all these crazies! haha

41 more days. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can ....

"Mrs. Mac is fat"

I had lunch duty today and stepped out for a minute to use the restroom. When I came back in one little boy in my class was sitting at the table SOBBING! I went over and asked what was wrong but he couldn't even get words out. Finally the little boy sitting next to him informs me, "he's upset because he called Mrs. Mac fat and we told on him". I informed him that it is not nice to say things like that and walked away. He can cry all he wants, we don't call people (especially teachers) fat!

Well, he literally sits at his table and just cries the entire lunch. I'm talking uncontrollable sobbing (mind you this is like the sweetest little boy in the world so he is crying because he is so upset and not that he got in trouble). Finally, my teammate decides she can't let his day be ruined so she goes over to talk to him about it (she's the one he called fat). She asks him to come talk to her and as soon as he walks over to her he grips on to her in the HUGEST hug and just cries all over her shoulder. They had a talk, and he went back to his table while drying up his tears. She had a huge wet spot all over her shirt from his sweet little tears. Poor kid was devestated. Fortunately for him, Coleen didn't care. She said she told him "well sweetheart, of course it's true, but ladies don't like for people to say that to them anyway" and laughed.

too darn funny.

"prison riot"

So everyone knows our first graders are crazy. I'm talking CRAZY lol! It's not like every kid is crazy of course, but the group as a whole is just one big crazy mix of children. They are wild, and they do what they want for the most part. Well, this week it was decided that, because they are so crazy, all 5 teachers needed to be outside at recess as crowd control. So, our principal asked 3 office staff members to do our lunch duty so we could all have recess duty all the time. Today was the first day they were in the lunch room with our kids.

We were all sitting in the lounge enjoying lunch together when one of the ladies comes in and says "oh. my. gosh. I thought there was about to be a prison riot in there!" Apparently, out of nowhere, ALL the kids in the cafeteria started doing stomp stomp clap and then started the chant "we will we will rock you". The ladies in there didn't know what to do. One of them actually got up on the table and started yelling at them to get them to stop. INSANITY I tell you. Absolute insanity.

This is what we deal with on a daily basis. First graders are CRAZY! haha